On The Job

Koontz - I hate to start all my posts with a comment on Jodi's previous one, but what the heck-this is where Jodi and I get to talk to each other too.

Jodi's comment regarding keeping up with the industry is so accurate. Case in point; my partner and I have been reading about the use of flexible supply lines for water and gas for several years. They've been using this method for some time on the East coast, but because of the difference in our building, (between East coast and West coast), we don't have easy access to all the same products. So the flexible lines migrate to the West and go through their code certification issues, and finally it's available to me in my town. But I don't have the time to research the product myself and so I read about it, even see it around, but I'm not using it. Push came to shove on a recent remodel though and we finally took the time to scope the products out. It was a tussle even then. Getting training on the use and finding a supplier means at least a couple of days off the job and several nights on the phone and the internet, (hooray for the internet!) Luckily, I would push, and then decide we should get back "on the job", and by then my partner would push and motivate us to continue the research.

So we get everything together, get back on the job, and a project that we had estimated at eight hours, with a person and 1/2, (if that seems screwy, you should see our bids!), took one person two hours. I'm immediately in love! (with the product).

I'm also disgusted it took us so long to check it out-but that is not atypical. We often discover new products only because our clients have seen them and want us to use them, or a sub-contractor is using something he or she discovered and we can check it out.

New products in construction are no different that anywhere else. They make big claims and they may or may not live up to them, and typically, a client's house is not a good experimental ground...so we have to know they will function as described before we make the leap. As a result, we often just rely on the tried and true methods we all ready know will work.

But I'm digging these two new methods, (gas lines and water lines), and if I never have to thread another piece of pipe, well I'll just kiss this inventor full on the lips!

P.S.-I too often wonder where the D.I.Y. experts find the time to actually work! And who writes the scripts for them? I heard an "expert" refer to a stud the other day as a "jack stud". In my world, we would call this positioned stud a "king stud". There are jack rafters, but I've never heard of a jack stud...don't they have any technical people on these shows???

Media Star or Building Professional? You Choose

Fitzpatrick--Here’s another thing about home improvement “experts.” While you’re running your media empire of TV shows, newspaper columns, magazine articles and homeshow appearances, when do you actually have time to practice these skills you are supposed to be “expert” in?

The home improvement industry evolves rapidly, with new products, laws, codes and concerns emerging daily. You can hardly keep up if you’re actually immersed in the industry, actually doing the work, let alone if you spend all day talking and writing about doing the work.

If you scan this blog, you’ll notice that I post more often than Peg. That’s because Peg works at her job fulltime, every day, while I’m a part-timer.

Four years ago I injured my neck and was diagnosed with four degenerated cervical disks, the result of viewing plans for hours at a time on a flat surface. (Poor office ergonomics injure as many people as heavy labor does). This means I suffer a moderate amount of pain continually which is aggravated by most of the things you do as a designer--drafting, keyboarding, craning your neck over large sets of plans. Each year since the injury I’ve taken on fewer and fewer jobs. This year I will do only one; my own house. (More later).

And I already feel like I’m out of touch with the industry, even though...

I’m required to take ten units of continuing education each year (for NKBA).

My husband and I own a commercial floorcovering company and every night I’m regaled with tales from the front lines of multi-million-dollar building projects.

I attend at least two trade shows a year.

I attend at least two home shows a year.

I receive eight design and/or building magazines, all but two of them professional journals.

There is no substitute for being on a jobsite every day, interacting with actual clients and actual materials on actual projects. That's what makes an expert.

Why I Hate Home Improvement "Experts" v. 19.2

Fitzpatrick-- A 24-year-old master carpenter? Using liquid nails? Right.

As a design professional, if there is one thing that burns me more than the home improvement media industry it’s the unqualified people who pimp themselves as “experts.”

A review of home improvement TV websites turns up very few licensed or accredited professionals. Mostly, you get a version of “I’m not a doctor but I play one on TV.” While that may sell pain relievers, would you take advice for your home remodeling project from such a person? People do every day. Just because this media-genic personality enjoys gutting their own apartment, doesn’t make him/her an expert on building, contracting, design or architecture.

I recently began receiving an e-newsletter aimed at the professional design industry. Plinth and Chintz http://www.plinthandchintz.com is generally well-written and informative and there are actual licensed, accredited members of several design organizations as contributing writers. But when I looked up the articles on how to find and hire contractors, the author “expert” is described as a “serial homeowner.” So because he's owned a bunch of homes and worked on them, that makes him an "expert?" The advice in his articles is better than most of this ilk, but it still belies an amateur approach, mostly because he assumes the homeowner is not using a design professional such as an architect. And this is a magazine aimed at professional designers.

Here are some things I’m an “expert” at:

Dogs. I’ve been a mom to five dogs, a “serial dog owner,” therefore I am qualified to write articles and host shows on dog health, breed selection, training and how to get along at the dogpark. (Or better, how to get kicked out).

Cars. Hey, I’ve owned three, so I suppose I’m a “serial car owner,” qualified to tell you how to hire and fire mechanics and how to get the best deal on a vehicle and how to customize your ride. I used to change my own oil--I guess that makes me a mechanic too.

Plucking Eyebrows. The suckers grow down to my eyelids for chrissakes, so since I’ve been tackling this job for years, this makes me an “expert aesthetician.”

Folks this is silly and dangerous. I don’t know any professions currently more trivialized than the building and design trades.

The Evils of TV

Koontz - Before I go on to my TV topic, a small insertion regarding counter-balanced windows.

A counter-balanced window in a period home operates with a pulley built into the window jamb through which a sash cord is strung. On the window side, the cord is knotted and inserted into a groove cut out of the window frame. On the jamb side, the cord goes into the wall space and is tied off to a weight. When you operate the window the weight gives resistance so the window stays where you leave it.

New windows operate on a tension fitting; the tightness of the window against the frame. There are clips and wires that keep the window in place in the frame, but the window itself is not counter-balanced by anything. If the window is large, the tension method just makes the window hard to operate.

Now for TV! My partner, Keith, asked me if I had caught any of the Oprah Show the other day. He was livid! Oprah had carpenters from several of the DIY shows on. Keith said they were all very cute, (trolling), and young, and claiming to be Master carpenters. In our world of carpentry, it is virtually impossible to have reached Master carpenter level at the age of 24. You would have had to begin your career around the age of seven...a tad earlier in fact.

Apparently they showed a few projects, or worked on a few projects and they were using Liquid Nails, (a construction adhesive), and nail guns. A Master carpenter takes pride in the joinery and would not tout the use of adhesive to hold it all together. (That's not to say they wouldn't use an adhesive, but they wouldn't claim that it was their primary construction method).

Though I am a fan of educating people to do things themselves, when and where they can; I am not a fan of these shows that give the public the impression that carpenters become Masters when they discover a caulking gun, or designers spend their time ripping off ideas that are created for one space, but will work as well in any other!

Why I Hate Home Improvement TV, v.15.7

Fitzpatrick--Why doesn’t the general public understand what a designer does or subscribe any value to our profession?

We know from L.A. Law and even Ally McBeal (for-crying-out-loud) what a lawyer does and why you might want to hire one. We know from CSI generally what forensic specialists do and from the Sopranos, how to hire a hit man and roughly how much it might cost. Everyone understands how the Dog Whisperer earns his keep.

Here’s an e-mail snippet from a production company soliciting designers for an upcoming home improvement t.v. show. It was forwarded to me in January 2006 from the American Society of Interior Designers, of which I am a professional member. (Read: a four-year interior design degree, a two-year internship; a two-day exam). While ASID wasn’t wild about the show’s concept, (“decorative in nature”) they wanted to get some of their people on it. Because they’ve done such a lame-assed job promoting our profession. Oops--started the red early. Read the production company’s concept and requirements, then read my comments in red:

MY STAR* HOME

*Names changed.

Every home decorating magazine is full of photos of glamorous rooms. No kidding? Foremost in interest for readers: the homes of their favorite celebrities. Noam Chomsky’s den? Many fans flipping through the pages of these glossy publications have dreamt of recreating one of these celebrity spaces in their own home. Truly, this country is in its Bread and Circuses stage. If you identify with a star, how cool would it be to live like one? I can’t even respond to this. If money is no object anything is possible, but if money is an object how do you replicate a million dollar room for just $3000? You don’t.

CLUELESS PRODUCTION COMPANY’S* MY STAR* HOME takes on the world of great decorating on a dime. Aren’t they infringing on someone’s TM here? In each hour-long episode we'll recreate a celebrity look-alike room on a non-look-alike budget. It's all about the shopping. I thought it was all about the design? After all, if a designer hadn't designed the original from which you intend to wantonly steal, the shopper wouldn’t have anything to shop for.

The Cast:
Our Host ... Our storyteller and orchestra leader. He's a smart guy Why no gal? with a great sense of humor and terrific story telling ability. I know this vinyl siding salesperson....Though not a designer himself, he just plays one on TV he has a great sense of what looks good, and though not a craftsman himself, he just plays one on TV he acts as a general contractor this is ILLEGAL in California, like practicing medicine without a license. Unfortunatly, you can practice design without a license all you want. More on this later. in the makeover of the subject room. He makes it all happen to the designer's specifications that's right folks, this show doesn't exist without a designer, but everyone gets paid but her and is available to go "on assignment" to help the designer get it all done in time.

Our Designer ... A team of rotating designers through the 10 episode series. She/He has the ability to look at the feel of the room to be copied and articulate the essence to homeowners and viewers alike. Plagiarizing another designer’s work is against the ASID Code of Ethics. The designer defines and specifies the necessary fabrics, furniture, colors, and accessories that define the room and shops the room "for less" while giving tips to the homeowners and viewers along the way. Most designers charge between $80-$250 per/hour. That $3,000 goes by really fast in the real world.

Our Shopper ... The go-to-go-getter... When the celebrity's bedroom features a hand carved four-poster bed, a bed that cost the star $15,000, our shopper locates and helps the designer to get a similar bed into the makeover room for well under a thousand. How? A foam and poster paint model? Ikea? Our shopper travels far and wide to auctions, thrift shops, furniture stores, and even dumpsters to find just the right piece to make the room. And all this travel and time costs what...???

THE RULES:
-6 hour shopping limit from our team's mission start of shopping until they return with all the stuff! “…travels far and wide to auctions, thrift shops, furniture stores and even dumpsters…” In six hours? A thorough dumpster dive is 30 minutes at least….
-Home-owner chooses one design from two rooms from a celebrity's home.
-Any item not in hand at the end of the time limit will not be included in the final room design.
-$3000 budget for acquisition and shipping of goods (furniture, fabrics, etc., no charge for labor THIS IS THE HEART, THE SUPREME, THE PENULTIMATE POINT. As a designer, all I have to sell is my time and my labor, but here, Clueless TV Production Company says that’s worth squat. So for the foreseeable future, I’m spending hours explaining to prospective clients why I just don’t show up and do their job for free. In six hours. or paint). Benjamin Moore should get right on that.

If you are interested in being considered as a designer for the show, NOT please send video of yourself I look like a troll but I’m a great designer, will you take me? NOT and your work along with a resume. If you don't have a video, forward a mini-portfolio, resume and photograph of yourself Troll-screening again (if selected for the next round you will do a screen test). We don’t do screen tests here at RR; the screens kept exploding. The deadline for this very tight - please send information by the first week in January to

CLUELESS PRODUCTION COMPANY


These folks are for real, and they make me and every other designer have to justify our existence on a daily basis. And our professional organization not only lays down and takes it, but is darn near in cohoots.

I’m going to pour myself a stiffy and just bawl.

Why I Hate Home Improvement Television, Version 15.6

Fitzpatrick-I received a very nice e-mail last week from a woman who found my listing on the National Kitchen and Bath Association website, www.nkba.org. She was in the planning stages of a remodel on a ranch in a rural area nearby. She wanted a house in town; her husband likes his land. They compromised by deciding to remodel the existing house, mainly, a kitchen and two baths. She has dogs, kids, a pool and wondered if I could help her.

I messaged her back with a lot of information, one point being that I have a big dirty husband and several big dirty dogs. This was encouraging to her, but in her next e-mail she mentioned two things that disturbed me: One, she is a home improvement television addict; two, could I tell her what exactly it is that I, as a kitchen and bath designer, would be doing?

Trading Spaces is the highest rated show on the tube right now, yet this woman has no idea what a kitchen and bath designer does or why she should pay for one.

What’s wrong with this set of plans?

Restoring Period Windows

Koontz - I agree with Jodi that installing new, retrofit windows would be a mistake for her friend's older home. And I appreciate Jodi's advice that her friend should look for someone to restore the windows. I would suggest a second option.

I used to own a Taylor Wheeler-built house a bit farther south than Jodi's friend. My partner and I restored those windows and I was thrilled with the results. We replaced wood where it was rotted, used an epoxy patch system where we could, replaced broken glass, replaced all the sash cords, stripped paint off the runners and re-waxed them and replaced the hardware. At then end of the project, my partner's Dad showed up with new wooden screens that he had built, and the correct hanger method for them. Though I loved that the windows operated again, the screens actually completed the process and I was snobbishly proud to have one of the few houses on the block whose windows looked the way they should. (So don't forget the screens!).

If I were undertaking the same project today-I would replace the glass with dual-glazed glass.
Now here's the rub-older homes often have glass in them that has this cool rippling effect when you view it. The ripple is a result of impurities in the production, but what was a mistake back then has become a much sought after item now.

In my 1930's Taylor Wheeler, I didn't have any rippled glass-the glass at my place had probably been replaced in the intervening years, because the twin house next door, (literally a twin house-same pad, same builder, reversed floor plan), did have some windows with rippled glass.
So in my place, I would choose to completely rebuild the windows and use dual-glazed glass. But I would not put in new windows from a window company. I would look for a carpenter/glazer who could build to my specifications. I loved the double hung windows I had that operate on a counter-balance. New windows don't operate that way, and I hate them. I don't care that they are weather-stripped up the wazoo, I've never seen them work as well as counter-balanced windows; and the larger the window, the less likely it will work well unless it's counter-balanced.
Now if you do have rippled glass, and you want to preserve it, you need to restore what exists, and if you choose new windows-at least save that glass, as there are alot of us who will pay dearly to have it....

P.S.-Because of the way dual glazed panes are installed, window installers always say you have to order the entire window. This doesn't make sense to me, as panes get broken in dual-glazed and they can be replaced---it makes sense that you might be able to route-out the existing window frame so it would be a little less deep, and install a pre-made dual-glass panel. I just ran across an old friend who does windows, I'll check with him.